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Post by BrentKoivopolo888 on Apr 4, 2021 3:10:15 GMT -6
(NON SW)
This is an add-on. Unlike the other HV's this one must be kept strictly PG. I start. Any registered user can jump in. Plot synopsis: A bunch of college kids fly from Illivanianois to EUroplandasia East and go on a wild Road trip in a big RV and travel all over doing stuff and experiencing life together. They don't do drugs or sleep around but bad language is allowed. At the end the chief male lead meats a girl he had been emailing from America at a church and her father makes them have a shotgun wedding on the spot, and also makes him spend several hours in the confessional confessing every sin he had ever done and he confesses to all kinds of wacky things to her father the priest. Such as well there was that time I sat on my cat accidentally, and there was the time I chased my sister around with a hammer as a 4 year old, and the time I was very flatulent at my cousins 14th birthday party and the time I dropped all my books in the library and the librarian told me to be quiet people were trying to study, you know a whole laundry list of mistakes that are more flaws than sin, each one more weird and hilarious than the next. In this Road trip anything goes from encountering the lady in the lake in the woods of Brittony to meeting an ancient Alan Quartermain who mutters that even this woke me too generation are finding King Solomons mines these days, to Bill and Ted References, a Leprechaun that tries to cast evil limerick spells on them that do crazy things to the chagrin of the poor Leprechaun, fauns and Satyrs, water spirits that tell crazy riddles like why do New York City Policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants, a plane running into a house and a second plane running into its three-car garage with no one dying (no one dies in this movie at all. Plenty of injuries though) A shark attack on a beach and the main male lead kayaking the shark and knocking it 20 feet back into the ocean and it swims away whining like a wounded coyote to protect his best friend. Star Wars Star Trek, Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy a freak snowstorm in July where there are suddenly seven feet of snow on the ground and they have to shovel out their RV from the autobahn, and build a big snowman which comes to life, Santa's sleigh picks up frosty and pulls them ten feet to the snow to where it is not snowing at all and it is suddenly summer again, o the sky's the limit at the silliness and satire and direct references to every road trip movie from Bolt to Eurotrip to October Baby.
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Post by BrentKoivopolo888 on Apr 4, 2021 3:50:19 GMT -6
SC 01 INT BOY'S BEDROOM-DAY
A boy is typing an email on his blue laptop. We hear his thoughts as he types.
BOY (Thinking): Dear Elsa, I understand that Google Translate really stinks at translating my American English to your British English, which I am pretty sure must be as different to you from my language as Chinese is to Japanese, or possibly as different as American English to Korean, but I hope you are able to understand how I have really started to feel about you during our last several months of me emailing (how do you say emailing in British English I wonder?) you with no response, but I will say that your picture is so, so, so, so, so (how do you say so in British English I wonder? Hmmm....what if it translates to kill, kill, kill, oh man I better erase the five so's,..okay done) very much. If you were a guy and I was a girl I would think you were very handsome, (no wait, what? that don't make any sense, backspace backspace backspace, uh,..yeah,...) well anyway I think I've known you long enough to say I love you and want to marry you and have at least half your children, er i mean, er, make you have at least half of mine, er, well, not make you per se, (how do you say per se in British English, or say British English in British English, uh..)
Suddenly the lights all go out and the computer gives the blue screen of death with a fatal exception OE, etc.
BOY: Oh, maaaaaan! I gotta type all that over, well maybe not the same way, but still.....
Dragnet Theme plays loudly followed by the Naked Gun theme AND the opening music to Who Framed Roger Rabbit as the screen lights up with the Movie's title: ROADRIFF: SATIRE OF A COMEDY
and the names of the chief actors, executive producers, writers and Director. Then the lights come back on and the laptop screen comes back on with an old Dancing Baby screensaver, which disappears to reveal his email intact, unaffected by the power outage.
A voice from the other room says:
VOICE: Brother, what's a five-letter word for a corn plant starting with an s? I need it for my crossword puzzle for school.
BOY: Stalk, bro! Now stay outta my hair for a while, I gotta send this email and see if she writes back finally. She kinda has to now.
VOICE: Why?
BOY: She better! I just proposed.
VOICE: What does poposed mean?
BOY: I'll tell you when you're older...and..send.
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Post by BrentKoivopolo888 on Jan 5, 2022 15:09:02 GMT -6
EXT GOODBURGER DINER-DAY
A PURE WHITE BUILDING with RED TRIMMING and a BLUE ROOF GLISTENS in the SUNLIGHT.
INT GOODBURGER DINER-DAY
JOHN SANDERS and CHET NORTON are eating a PILE OF WHITE CASTLE-STYLE HAMBURGERS at a 60'S DINER STYLE COUNTER ON TWO BARSTOOLS. THE MENU ABOVE SAYS 1 GOODBURGER-4.99.
CHET: Oh my, but these Goodburgers are so delicious! I could eat them all day long!
JOHN takes a LONG SLURP of his WATER. CHET chugs his DR. POP.
JOHN talks with his mouth full of burger. He also shovels Golden Delicious fries into his mouth from a HUGE PLATTER.
On the menu it says FRIES SMALL 10.00 LARGE 30.00. KIDS SIZE 0.25 SUPER SIZE PLATTER SUPREME 55.55+S&H+tax
CRATE OF GOLDEN GOODNESS 125.25 PLUS FREE TOY INSIDE
JOHN: I need your advice about girls. How did you come to start courting Rose?
CHET: Well, we met through mutual friends then, well, she asked me to the school dance, and we hit it off.
JOHN: That's it? No international intrigue, adventure, time travel or....
CHET: Nope, just a normal run of the mill teen relationship, no drama.
Music starts up. John gets up from his stool and walks outside the diner. Chet follows.
John begins to sing.
JOHN: Little town.
CHET: (Interrupting) John, this is a big city....
JOHN (Still singing, not paying attention to his friend) Such a quiet village.
Every day, like the one before.
A gang of ruffians races down the street from a bank with a huge suitcase of money and the alarm sounding that the bank has been robbed. Meanwhile a piggy bank and a television set are thrown out of a nearby apartment window. Nearby, a car runs into a fire hydrant and water gushes everywhere.
JOHN: Little town, full of little people, stopping by to say......
MAN: Shut up!
WOMAN: Shut up!
TEENAGER: What are you singing for??!
CHET: Please, lets go back in the diner and eat, our burgers and fries are getting cold.
JOHN: (Continuing to sing, oblivious to his surroundings or friend, beginning to run with outstretched arms.) I want adventure in the Great Wide Somewhere! I want it more than I can tell! Don't you think it would be grand-to take Elsa by the hand-
OLD MAN: Who's Elsa?!
TEENAGER: Freak!
JOHN: I want so much more than they've got planned-Ok, let's go back to our food. Those burgers haven't sprouted legs and walked off. Now, how do you win a young girl's heart, Chet?
INT GOODBURGER DINER
CHET: (Between chewing good, swallowing and taking another bite) Well, you can't force it. Love is give and take. Like that song. You can't hurry it.
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